Important feedback from prior years:


* Several pissed off reports about the "skateboard hockey stick dude" (young afroamerican with mad skills). No actual harm but many riders alarmed by near misses.
* "The police in front rode too fast and screwed up our pace. They actually created an unsafe condition stretching the ride out allowing cabbies to race through the gaps." But Steven was hesitant to give them a hard time due to being naked. Some discussion resulted about managing slower timing.
* Reportedly some soft ejections of drunks off tail. As usual advise them to get dressed, lock up and call Uber.
* Official review: "Braving a cool forecast thousands found their way to yet another big west loop lot covered with massive graffiti. The ride continues to operate well as a self sustaining community of broad skill levels with a solid core of experienced riders. Body painting has largely transitioned to a self managing team of pros working for tips, which both increases quality and reduces our supply and storage needs. Organization and production were great. We produced a fresh poster, rented potties, and even got lunches donated to a fairly large volunteer staff. We gave away hundreds of waters and fruits which paid for themselves. Event radios worked fine but were barely used, and the modest after party was uneventful."


Someone successfully jammed our radios for the entire ride. That was big, putting the final nail in the coffin of non-commercial grade radios being useful only as security costuming accessories. As usual, I'm pushing for cellphone based solutions, using a mix of GroupMe and FindMyFriends, backup power and bluetooth earbuds.
Our singular annual disgruntled bully made a feisty drunken appearance, but I consider that situation stable, naively hoping that next year he'll just stay home. Similarly the known sexual assaulter Baramesi Ra snuck into the ride with camera despite being repeatedly banned, earning this doxing as we've previously been too nice.
I solicit post-ride stories, and heard only a few garden variety ones, and this year we had RECORD turnout, so keep doing what you're doing.


Heyu Kelley again expressed serious and reasonable disgruntlement with after-ride problems at the reserve. Also, he's continued to develop the space into a pure parking lot, now largely full of paid renters. As of 2017 we'll need to find a new launch point.


Pros: In reasonable retrospect, I've been calling it the calmest WNBRC ever. I personally only saw one cyclist fall, and it was partly pavement slickness related. I stopped cars a few times and they responded well to standard gentle approaches. Average drunkenness (on ride) seemed more moderate and spectators were well behaved. And we even peacefully tolerated some demons. I *REALLY* like that "Jedi mind tricks" and "drunk whispering" is referenced in safety training, and my own synopsis "Always Be de-esCalting"
I'm impressed that we managed to deal with rain, that viaduct is such a blessing, having shelter for hundreds.
Possibly the best pedicab turnout ever. Was T.c. O'Rourke's (pedicab license #1) first time I believe. Also Lauren Sailor visiting helped, and lots of Rats.
No arrests nor ambulance trips that I heard of. Big yay!
Bike parking and sound system and potties remain great.
The fire, the kegs, we can never thank Heyu enough. And the friends and the stories, near perfection.

Could be betters:

  1. Earlier shutdown. Comes up again and again and again. I'm tired of being among the more sober there after 3am. At least clear out non-volunteers. That in itself would solve several other common problems.
  2. Radio deployment failure. Weak ones given to key personnel. I volunteered repeatedly to handle all aspects. Largely wasted my procurement and planning effort. And we should be using FindFriends and handlebar mounts instead.
  3. Xavier. Why did this reach me? Why did it take until 5am? Why a third chance?
  4. The masturbating guy. What happened to "No!"? Why no photos? I heard he was escorted off multiple times. Good job. I didn't personally see any of this.
  5. The dizzying middle container. "Big hot metal box full of naked people operating normally." I suspect an airflow problem.
  6. Who's the "multi-year documentary" video team? Did someone OK that? Details would be nice.
  7. Bag check? Explore the idea. I like it.
  8. Victim compensation to Dan? Check bank balance, and if we can use funds that way, and if he'd like.
  9. Volunteers should wear a vest and serve versus "doing their own thing". We need chaperones most of all over any other ride-time roles.
  10. Not every event can explicitly include every cause to the degree of visibility that every cause may wish. "Fuck The Police" for example is not helpful (but would be great on a Critical Mass). Please simplify and focus on core messages.
  11. Some additional action items have been added or updated in the master To Do list. Most specifically "Formalize voting" has been restored as a top priority item.



1. Before the ride even started, a security person cut his hand with a huge knife and I bandaged it.

2. Girl pulling into the lot fell on the potholes, badly cutting/scraping both knees. I cleaned and bandaged that. I then knew I needed more bandages and wet wipes so ran to Jewel/Osco for that.

3. Drunk girl who crashed but refused help on Kinzie at the very start of the ride.

4. Rather serious crash on Fullerton happened right in front of me. Girl in left open lane riding fast in left lane and got clipped by guy who came out and hit her. She went down.

I cleaned and bandaged her hip, shoulder and arm. She had a huge shiner, bump, on her forehead. I gave head injury precautions to her and her friends, one of whom went and got ice to put on the lump.

After that I had to hustle to catch back up and but didn't see or handle any other injuries.

How'd the other medics do? I never saw them. Were they at the front?

I thought the ride went well overall. I think there could have been more barricading of drunks but I didn't see anything that looked like a problem or disturbing.

The North Pond stop was too tight and crowded a space so everyone was forced to basically stand there with their bikes waiting to be able to leave.

Also, women there were asking me where there were bathrooms and other than telling them to put clothes on and use the restaurant there wasn't a good option for them. I told some to go up to the park district bathrooms at Diversey but they didn't want to do that either.

Perhaps next year, North Avenue Beach House? Huge, clean bathrooms. Or, even Waveland Golf Course. It's a very large park area and has a huge bathroom. Not sure of the hours but I believe it would be open.

"Medical" - within the 1st block, a girl was so drunk she fell off her bike twice. Refused medical attention. Advised her friend to get her home ASAP.
Mechanical - very light pair of pants came untied from around someone's waist, got tangled in their rear derailleur. Happened just before the rest area. Took 3-5 minutes to clear.
-Seatpost clamp failure. Either bolts worked loose, or the stamped metal of the clamp had fatigued and bent. Either way, could not get repaired quickly enough, and the rider + her companion had to drop out.
I feel like there might have been another mechanical issue, but I'm not remembering at the moment.
Safety - Pre-ride, it was reported to me that a male with red hair and X's over his eyes had been grabbing women's asses. He disappeared into the crowd before I could spot him.
-In Boystown, at least one pedestrian walked out into the middle of the pack, left without incident upon instructions to do so.
-Afterparty, a drunk woman was balancing on the free-standing wall. I asked her to get down for her own safety, and she did without complaint or argument.
Pet peeve: people (i.e., men) joining the ride part of the way through, filming women (and only women), refusing to remove any clothing. IMO, there should be an attempt to prevent people from joining that won't ride unclothed.
That's pretty much all that I personally noticed.


I left a dozen of the classic iron-on t-shirts in big ziplocks on the right cargo back storage shelves. Please give them to volunteers.

I saw fairly frequent bike crashes, maybe five altogether. Noteworthy in that I was just one rider in one spot. Multiplying that out to the whole ride space and duration there must have been dozens and dozens. All were fairly low speed, I'm not certain I saw any bikes too damaged, but certainly some minor owies. Half were likely booze related, but not all.

There were a few long stalls, as usual I guess. Sorry I didn't stopwatch, but felt like at least three pauses of at least three minutes duration. Long enough to have conversations and refill water bottles. But fortunately on stretches without drunken bros. On Diversey in particular, east of Clark, I actually left a group of friends, locked up at the 7-11, bought a coke and rejoined the same unmoved group.

Requiring lockup outside the lot was perfectly done. *Finally!*

Patrolling the lot during after-party was a welcome addition, even if literally only 1-3 lingering vested peeps.

I spent toner and labor doing flyer printing, but upon arrival was told it had already been done, and this may have happened before. A text telling me to not bother would've been nice.

Body paint inventory seemed very sparse. In particular I saw none of the Palmers 4oz plastic bottles of which there should be dozens. I presume their crate went unnoticed, but I also wondered if they survived freezing and thaws.

The unruly child hijacking the Twitter account pre-ride should not be understated. Ask if you'd like to see the crap he sent our 770 followers. I captured everything, even sender locations and his online boasts of doing it. Apparently his phone app was still logged in despite password changes months ago due to a missed deauthorize mobile users step for such cases. This incident should be referenced among definitive doubt erasers about his character.


Security must read
That IS the official reference. If it doesn't match reality, submit updates.

Do not have drunks be security lieutenants.

Consider whistles for security to help them pass on the left.
>> LOVE this. Definitely offer free whistles to security.

"Don't let pseudo-cops cork, or do anything really." - Lee Diamond, not sure exactly what is a pseudo-cop, but recording the advice.

When the corks peeled off, the crowd followed the corks, thinking we were taking a turn. It generally worked out, but not at the BP swirlie. Maybe fewer corks, and some people detailed to cork the ride itself at big turns? Maybe just one of the corks should turn back toward the ride, and use an arm to direct the crowd in the right direction? Something like that.

There were the naked people with flat tires who gave their clothes to friends, but we warned them like whoa.

Security refuses to share volunteer contact info with admin, needed for backup and phone-tree purposes.

Security chief openly ignores and mocks input from admin. Refused to discuss plans and specific staffing concerns. I realize it's a big job, but communicating "we just don't have the staff" or compromising or listening at all would've been infinitely better than sarcasm.

Consolidate recruiting. We need staff, not security staff and other staff.

Various mockeries in security's talking points were not funny. Security refused to use gender neutral terminology in riding formation advise.

Multiple complaints of diffident greeters at check-in, saying things like "if you don't like it fuck off" even to long term and fully qualified participants.

"Warm body" is NOT an adequate security volunteer vetting criteria.

Setup, check-in, stay behinds, and after ride security need better staffing. These are critical roles, yet some had nobody. Security ignored requests for such staffing as not part of security.

Several thefts in lot, could've been ameliorated with after-ride security.

No stay behind help!!!!! Caused several problems regarding unsecured assets.

Henceforth, no donations, selling, solicitations at all. "Commerce Free Zone"

Security's beer budget is now a top expense. The very concept has problems and needs re-thinking. It encourages intoxication, and draws volunteers for the wrong reason. Frankly volunteers should be volunteering because they support the event and/or cause. I'd suggest we change this to individual's choice and expense, physical day-of donations, or lower lump sump.
Also clothing should NOT necessarily be required for security. It potentially draws exactly the wrong people into the wrong role. This is not a standard in other cities.

Almost no volunteers staffing the body painting area.
Consider radically reducing the paint area. Caused too much mess anyway. Encourage self-sufficiency instead.

Practically no setup help beyond the usual senior facilitators.
By 6pm, still only a few dedicated senior staff were present.

The lot was still cluttered with construction equipment and debris at 6pm on ride day.

Security arrived late. Check-in was unstaffed at check-in time.

Storage container too cluttered and poorly lit to repack on ride night.
Little cleanup help. Turned into a next day debacle for Steven. Cleanup must be a known, and cooperatively engaged in, after-ride task. Note however we're fairly good on next day cleanup, and try to leave Richard's lot better than when we came.

Warming box got a bit weird, several times.
Last minute firewood wasn't needed.
Coffee was nice near dawn, but lets simplify that.

Andrew's post-ride depression ramblings:
There was far too much internal conflict this year. Far too much politics, ad-hominems, anger and hate. Far too many pointless last minute changes. Far too much fear mongering and negativity. Far too much over-complication. Far too little basic advance preparedness. Far too many whims explored while urgent known needs are ignored year after year. Far too much talking and intransigence, far too little listening and compromise. Stay-behinds, artists, early arrivals and late cleanup help, all completely flaked, like every year. I'm exhausted, and my aura is battered. I yearn for care-free rides, to spend the rest of the summer just being and moving. I need beach sunrises and skinny dipping. I need no deadlines. I need days to just breath. The vibe has darkened, and I need to retire this role.


Primary facilitators should've started working weeks to months earlier.
Could've then been better prepared on ride day. Could've gotten more press. Could've gotten city bike summer involvement.

Bike thefts. Locking needs to be encouraged. Lock bikes up at the fences at perimeter of lot? Stamp hands of people with bikes?

One security person lost due to crash. Drinking is a problem.

Insufficient last minute orientation info and advice. Could have done more with last emails.
Encourage responsibility, LNT, more TBD, etc.

Use the PA for more pre-ride tips and instructions. Add a megaphone.

Need a locking chest at entrance for things we're currently securing in truck, such as radios, vests, first aid, tape.

Is Oz park too soon in the route? Consider second rest stop?

Deal with Oz Park mess. Maybe need dedicated rest stop cleanup staff, since we're not going to educate everyone, and the park's waste is full anyway. At least, absolutely always bring hefty bags (this is old news) Maybe also formally declare after ride or next day cleanup party. Also make announcement about throwing away cig butts.

Didn't leave key for stay behinds.
Beer not iced (communications failure), and slight over purchase.

Pot smoking was too nonchalant. Could be smelled almost always. Dangerous to everyone should cops be around.

Too much drinking.

Ran out of maps. Should print more, and earlier. Also pre-ride earlier. Caused many to not get the rules (on back).

Potty lines too long. Dozens of people still waiting at ride time. Consider getting more? Formalize men's wall peeing spots? Secure indoor potties.

A few check-in complaints from the public, bad advice about photos, failure to advise those turned down about viewing points. Let's synchronize some procedures and details. Conversely, plenty of reports from security of creepy, sneaky, defiant participants.

Presence of provisions truck causes constant owner concern over perimeter and finish, and is fundamentally incongruous. Let's not have a truck in the lot. Either bring provisions in then park elsewhere, or use delivery and bike trailers. Reduces worry and increases space.

General Douchebaggery and Asshattery. Apply burning man communications lessons.

Avoid Wrigleyville recommended.

Paint crew needs dedicated leaders, to manage and form their own great teams.

Juan D.:
1) If you don't want to get your butt slapped by encouraged onlookers, stay in the center of the group.
2) Do not encourage butt slapping.
3) For larger groups, due to warmer weather, lowering the seat so you can stand comfortably with two feet on the ground, as the ride will stop and crawl plenty.

It's clear that for next year I will need to buy a short range FM transmitter. This way all sound bikes in the lot would be required to tune to the channel to increase range.
Note: Todd Allen has explored this at length, and reported extremely short legal distances.

John E.:
Also, for next year I'd like to arrange a better way to stow/distribute/secure the post-ride beer as it was left un-iced the entire ride until I rolled in at 12:15am. Maybe wristbands for those involved with planning/supporting the ride; saw quite a bit of it going to general participants. Perhaps next year I'll stay behind to make more seamless.
Also, any discussion on pre or post-ride grilling for 2013?


Single task people needed:
Mass count videos.
WebCam research.

Have an email signup at entrance.
Keep the entrance clear.
Keep donations open after ride.
Optimize stations to reduce congestion.
Add signpost flags identifying stations.
Almost all painters failed to arrive early.
Bring more tables. Bring safety pins.
Advise cyclists to stow bikes efficiently.

Too fast at end.
Loss of radio contact.
Bring water to rest stop.
Warn about no biking on sidewalks.

Need more staff. Need more vests.
Direct the re-gather and dispersal after end.
Improve control of cutoff, overflow and staging.
Add advice on sexual harassment in security info and rules.
Budget for booze.

One ambulance to ER before start of 2010 due to Whiskey.
Rowdy boy pissing off overpass near end of 2010.

Dan's game to just be the whole donation / water / snax area, right out of his truck. So front table can just greet and watch and give maps. Painting needs an upgrade, maybe add 4-6 card tables. There are now I feel too many photographers, especially if for example two other regulars had come. I'm going to ask if anyone wants to step down.

In photos:
1) show off the sheer size of the ride.
2) show future participants that people of all sizes, ages and levels of nakedness participate.
3) show some of the smart slogans that people have on their bodies.
4) show the good vibe - people who chose to be photographed smiling at the camera. (glitterguts does a good job doing that)


Get the Schwintonations?
Get the Racketteers?

Viewing spot with better access to transit, and specify transit to spectators in advance.
Pre-specification of goods brought to gathering required. No un-preapproved large donations of goods on ride day.
Water should be free.
Reassess primary contacts, job functions, level of responsibility, information access.
Always give street addresses.
Add after-party statement to ride guidelines. None? Self-organizing? Other?
Nothing last minute allowed in future.
Implement mosquito abatement?

Collect spare bikes in advance.
Increase service capabilities.

Strung out mass at several times, but worth noting that honestly head was relentlessly slow, which indicates cause is excess elasticity.
Reports of some left in park. Worries of some left in gathering. Worries of some left at check-in.

A few falls, a drug bust, maybe none worse?

People missing: Ronald Hale, Rob, Howard Kaplan, EE, ?

Just like last year. Photography, gawkers, pervs. Had to ask the security bunch like 5 times to go over to Ammo and protect her from strange gawkers. They just looked at me like, who are you?

Maybe render whole albums as a slideshow, in video file form.

Integrate bike safety as a primary message, as it ties in with the naked vulnerability.
Maybe call reflect-co, to come hand out reflectors and do a safety seminar.

Water water water.

In DIY body painting, have each person paint the next in line.

David Glow:
1. I noticed a much higher percentage of males this year.
2. This year many more people showed up in cars. Some walked up and said they had their bikes in the car down the block; others drove up with bikes in car. I told most: You have to come back here on a bike, then I'll tell you where to go. Some did. Others lurked in their cars, waiting for me to direct a group of cyclists--which the cagers then followed. I intended to keep cars from clogging the start point. Worth the effort?
3. I told a couple of cagers, even though they had bikes, that we'd canceled the ride--just cuz I got from them a bad car vibe. You might hear from them.
4. In past years we'd printed "ride has been canceled" flyers for easier ejection of losers. That woulda helped this year. Something I coulda done.
5. At a couple of moments I tried to hide the start point from lurking police by having bikers take a circuitous path to the start point. Worth the effort?
6. Some peds came by and said they'd gotten text messages recruiting them to volunteer. I sez, "No wheels, no info." Should I have handled differently?
7. I stayed at the corner till at least 9:15 cuz bikers kept coming. (I never did find the ride, tho; cold, tired and hungry, I didn't search for very long. Not complainin', just sayin'.) I saw naked aspirants riding down Milwaukee Ave. as late as 9:30.


Emphasize "responsibility" on flyers.
Pair up nudists and pedi-cabs.
Photographers must be naked.
Better security, involve and advise rat patrol.

Update leaflet.

Some trailers lost after startup due to speed and mechanical failures.
Some riders lost in Halsted bottleneck.

Assault of a trailer (at Fullerton+Lincoln)

Caution encouraged about photographers.

I'm considering making "RESPONSIBILITY" a key theme this year here.

Based on "leave no trace" and "if each of us made the world a little better" feedback. This could help address several biggest challenges here: garbage, hooliganism, supply costs, more. Could tie it in as reflections on energy decisions, environmentalism, and health.

12th District complained
Alderman Burrell
Something on Ashland shocked him, passing Union Park
BEWARE of Catholic and Baptist neighborhoods.

Think through acceptance of the ride by nationalities: Hispanic probably not.
Assume all densely ethnic will be socially conservative.

Penises ESPECIALLY discouraged.

Nightlife neighborhoods especially might be on our side.

Assess goals, what does it serve to piss off people, when we could be rejoicing people.

Create a weighted balance attribute evaluator matrix for route making decisions.

Find Lumpen's seven rules to carrying out a successful street action.
The band is the most powerful unit on the street.
Render yourself logistically fraught.
Cultivate your crowd, your witness, your shield, your audience, your distraction, ...